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when it’s time.

look at everything you have accomplished. imagine if you had asked for permission beforehand. half of these things wouldn’t have gotten done. think about it. what did asking permission ever get you? it got you a bunch of not getting in trouble for not asking permission when you were a child. that’s it. so don’t do it. don’t ask for permission. you’re not a child. do the brave thing. do the thing you haven’t done before.

and if it doesn’t turn out well, if it doesn’t turn out how you wanted, don’t even apologize. people don’t want apologies. they want you to acknowledge the harm or shortcoming in your changed behavior and through different results. this you can do quietly. so stop apologizing. fewer “i’m sorry’s” and more looking, more paying attention. less talking and more feeling into what’s really happening.

separately, it is absolutely good manners to over-communicate and mind your p’s and q’s and to announce all of your moves in advance. that’s fine. as an adult, you’ll have to determine when it’s time for manners and when it’s time to trust your gut and follow that inner guidance. when you become quiet, open and still, you’ll meet the part of you that just knows.