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the tree of desire.

there is a version of you who sits beneath the tree of desire. give me shade. give me relief. give me the fruit i have seen others eat. let my lovers and companions find me here, that they may know me by my desire. see how pure and strong and true it is. feel how much love i have to give. let my prayers and persistence and insistence change the world. let me serve, soften and shrink if it will help them to see what i see. give me what i desire so that i may leave. what i want is simple, and for the good of all. let me live peacefully in a world made right. bless my efforts and give me what i desire.

know that this is not the same version of you who stands suddenly to leave. still obviously unfed, though not quite as hungry as before. no longer seeking relief, and largely unmet. not healed, not hollow, but willing now to walk. mouth closed softly, in neither a frown nor a smile. you got what you wanted or were blessed by your own efforts. when the day came that wanting finally exhausted itself, it laid open whatever it is that exists beyond want.

when desire can no longer be summoned, you will find the one who leaves is the one who arrives.