183

the whole thing.

the whole thing is your soul’s curriculum in love. do you run from it? chase it? trust it? reserve it for some and not others? do you deserve it after you earn it? or do you deserve it because you exist? now, what about everyone else? you love them now or do you love them later, after they’ve apologized? after they’ve done enough to make you happy?

what were you told? first, they lie to you. then you believe the lie; you entertain doubt. and then you tell the truth to yourself. this is the process God allows.

because God doesn’t love you after you’ve made everyone in your life happy. God loves you now. God isn’t waiting to connect with some improved, future version of you. you’re connected now; always have been. and disconnection from others, love withheld by others — that’s just the illusion, the curriculum you asked for, delivered faithfully (even if delivered unconsciously) by other souls in the same school as you.

maybe you’ve not signed up for all the same classes, but we find each other in the playground and that’s where these things happen: betrayal, abandonment, pain and rejection. gifts that remind us: if you ever find yourself looking to the left and looking to the right with no friends by your side, look above and look within. you’ll find that to be alone is to be held in very good company, if you’ll have it.